What are Energy Vampires?
Energy vampire is not a clinical term, but it describes someone who significantly reduces one’s emotional energy, and who thrives off other people’s readiness to listen and care. As a result, people in touch with energy vampires may experience feelings of overwhelm, exhaustion and chronic stress, and may feel as if they are walking on eggshells when around these types of people.
Ways to Spot an Energy Vampire: The Warning Signs
- An energy vampire may look like someone who:
- Actively dumps their frustrations and negative emotions onto others
- Does not take responsibility for their actions
- Is frequently involved in drama
- Has trouble in experiencing happiness for other people’s success
- Invalidates one’s concerns and emphasises their own
- Redirects attention to themselves
- May be intimidating, critical and/or bully others
- Energy vampires may appear to be charismatic, bubbly, and warm, and may gravitate towards those who are kind, compassionate and sensitive.
It is important to note that energy vampires may not be aware of the impact of their behaviours on others. Also there are likely a range of factors influencing their behaviour, e.g., previous relationships, upbringing, or critical life events. It is important, where possible, to be aware of those people in your life who may be showcasing these behaviours. Checking in and supporting them, where practical and also seek help if you are concerned about their wellbeing, whilst simultaneously looking after yourself.
How to Deal with Energy Vampires? How to Preserve Your Energy?
- Set boundaries: e.g., setting beginning and end times when you make plans, choosing an appropriate location to facilitate this
- Lower your expectations: Learn to identify their unhelpful behaviours, which will assist with developing realistic expectations and protecting yourself from disappointment
- Part ways with them if it’s impacting on your mental health, e.g., disrupting your mood or daily functioning
- Use assertive communication, e.g., saying “no” respectfully
- Focus on your self-worth and being around those who are supportive and share your values
- Practise self-care, including engaging with things which bring you pleasure
- Reach out for support from your social network, or seek professional support, if in need
More Information
Throughout October we will be diving into the topic ‘Despooking Mental Health’. We will be unmasking stigmas, discussing the psychology behind ghosting and encountering energy vampires.
